Worried

Dear Abby,
I am a crack dealer in Mt. Washington, KY who has recently been diagnosed
as a carrier of HIV virus.
My parents live in Morehead and one of my sisters, who lives in West Liberty,
is married to a transvestite.
My father and mother have recently been arrested for growing and selling
marijuana. They are financially dependent on my other two sisters, who are
prostitutes in Covington.
I have two brothers, one is currently serving a non-parole life sentence at
Eddyville for the murder of a teenage boy in 1994. My other brother is
currently in jail awaiting charges of sexual misconduct with his three children.
I have recently become engaged to marry a former prostitute who lives in
Campton. She is a part time “working girl.”
All things considered, my problem is this: I love my fiancée and look forward to bringing her into the family. I certainly want to be totally open and honest with her. But…should I tell her about my cousin who is a Kerry supporter?
Signed,
Worried About My Reputation

5 Responses to “Worried”

  1. i forget….what’s wrong with Kerry

  2. He’s old. Oooooooooooollllllddddd.

    “Vote for me, filthy plebians.”
    -John Kerry, 2004

  3. Hmmmmmm. If he’s worried because the cousin is a Kerry supporter that must mean the rest of the family supports Bush. Just goes to show what the base of Bush’s support must be

  4. I admire you on the willingness to share this info with others – good luck!

  5. obviously, the faggot who wrote this (faggots always like to daydream that they are prostitutes or the siblings of prostitutes, etc.etc.) doesn’t realize that the xenophobic-stereotype humor section is a bit further in the back (where he would usually find his gay porn) behind the stacks of purchased/stolen/illegitimate ballot boxes and dead soldier’s cheap government coffins….Yuck it up faggots…..when you finally get pulled from the reins of this far-gone and f* country, nobody within a f* 10 thousand mile radius of this side of hell will call themselves republicans anymore…..nobody that wants to get elected…..Oh, and also, I seriously hope that the mythical Christian HELL you guys go on so much about really does exist….you’re the only ones with the idiocy and lack of imagination to actually appreciate it, so hurry up and blow yourselves up in those wars now!! Wouldn’t want to run out of malt liquor and propane before the Jews get down there with you !!!

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